They Caused This

School is supposed to be an escape,

but instead it is the anxiety.

The constant need to an A,

on my dreaded Calc exam.

Otherwise, I'm a failure. 

It becomes so unmanageable,

I forget who I am. 

Having to keep a smile—

When the words you hear,

all just sound like air.

Piercing eyes and neglect, 

from your peers.

The whisper’s of “so and so did this,”

and “did you see what happen to…”

Followed by the lies and drama that

foam out of their mouth

like a dog with rabies. 

Too weird and annoying,

to be “popular” and liked. 

All because I don’t play the game

they play. 

Just a place to fulfill

the peace and happiness,

they need. 

Somewhere with a fresh canvas

screams my name. 

No. 2 pencils just sharpened.

Paint so new, 

the scent diffuses through the air. 

Not a need for an eraser.

Not a need for a sharpie.

As the water hits the pallet,

the colors move effortlessly,

doing as they please.

The blank slate stares back at me,

now smothered with love.

Just a place to fulfill,

the long awaited peace and happiness 

I needed.