I. Christmas morning, we sat in a princess tent in the living room, played with our newly opened toys and watched TV like we always did with dad. We shared a room— Do you remember? We used to line the edge of our beds with stuffed animals like a little army Yet still hold on tight to baby bunny and sock monkey You helped me make a dance for the talent show I always tried to sleep before you I begged, can you please turn your light off? You would bicker with me or just stay silent as you watched nickelodeon When you moved to your own room 12 steps to the left I wanted the same bright light that kept me awake all those nights. I moved my bed into the space you left. I couldn't fall asleep without The Drake and Josh song playing in the background II. I pushed you in a store once. I took it too far. I couldn't forget. Did you? I always wanted to hang out with your friends— I was annoying and loud. Now my voice has faded. Did you notice I went quiet? Remember when you had your first heartbreak? You came home from school. Mom decorated your room. With all the things you like— Did you know I helped her? I put together the cookies and the comfy PJs I laid them out on your bed I made it look nice. I hope it made you feel better. I want our room back. I want you to leave the light on. Open that door again. Don't shut it in my face Don't strangle my neck with bob wire As my face gets hot and my eyes swell up. Let's play in the snow again Help me put my snow suit on We can go down the slide together push the snow as we go down Just turn around and tell me you love me And I will say it back Please do it first Please validate me I long to be— anywhere That makes us family.