Martha always preferred the more respectable sustenance: oatmeal, apple slices, almond milk. She was a practical gal. It came as a shock, then, when she came out as gay. Seventy-three years old, my neighbor’s got a girlfriend. I liked her lady. She made the real stuff; French toast, omelets, sausage. Martha loved her so much, she allowed herself to be spoiled. Martha always said since meeting Gwen, her body was constantly full of love and cholesterol. While Gwen made Martha’s heart sing, her cooking made it stop beating. Now I say goodbye, dear friend. You beloved hypocrite.